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Unable to decide whether to make a pirate movie, a Western, or a dinosaur flick, director Norman Dawn decided to make all three at once. It's 1830 and the clipper ship Hamilton Queen is leaving New England for the East Indies. James Arness in his pre-Gunsmoke days stars as Kirk Hamilton, the son of the ship's owner who is there to tell the captain what to do, like go through the pirate-infested waters to cut a day off their schedule. When the pirates attack, Kirk is seriously injured, so they drop him off on an island near Australia to heal. The movie slips into "Western" mode when he helps the townsfolk form an American-styled militia to protect them from the pirates (and gets involved in a love triangle). Then the pirates return to steal some women, so Kirk and company chase after them and get shipwrecked on an island full of dinosaurs. Some might say this plot was just an excuse to use whatever stock footage was sitting around. Who cares? This movie gives a great look back at what low-budget filmmaking was like in 1950. Plus, the narration that glues the disparate scenes together is as overstated, flowery and entertaining as any narration from an Ed Wood film. Though only 61 minutes long, Two Lost Worlds is honest camp and pure pleasure. --Andy Spletzer
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